Let us establish some ground rules
We're talking bands here
solo artists with renowned backing groups
e.g. Crazy Horse / the E Street Band are clearly not bands
thus disqualified from this discussion good day
Any audience member who nominates
or leads the cheers for 70s/80s
rock stroke glam stroke hair rock bands such as
Kiss Aerosmith Van Halen Bon Jovi, Guns n Roses
- I could go on please don't- shall be found in
contempt of court and their protes-
ations shall not be admitted good day
Niche will not cut it however
sympathetic the judge may be
so sorry Pavement Pixies Fugazi et cet
we're looking for mainstream success + cultural import
the combo of 'cutting through'
So let us acknowledge
that Talking Heads and Blondie
are good calls ~and move on~
And what about the Dead
what to do with the Dead *sighs*
the court sympathizes, but
please respect the science, viz.
We need a catalogue
of well known tunes some say hits, popular
and legacy but crucially non-divisive
which sees off contenders such as
the Doors (loved by many, yet hated by many),
Steely Dan (see previous), Eagles (you get the picture)
murder your darlings //
personal favourites are irrelevant
we must respect the scientific method
Quick reminder: the Bee Gees are not American
and any votes for them will be vigorously prosecuted
see also the Fleetwood Mac clause
& excuse me, Rush are Canadian
take that man away!
Please be aware
I have another list here of more than
100 bands mere mention of whose names
could result in instant prison time
Which also +++ pauses for lunch +++
discounts the Beach Boys, face it very
inconsistent, excuse me, did I hear someone say
what about the Monkees!
*Bangs gavel*
*Clears throat*
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury there
remain two credible candidates
whose brief but impactful careers
appealed to different generations
broke across political divides and
[[[transcript ends here]]]
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