Busy Lizard Season

yah idk maybe
catch me at the next rooftop hang

ahll be there
at the backyard barbecue
see ya where
at the next block party

wearing a bandolier
of ginger shots
no orange wine for me 

catching the rifle
with effortless rizz

*until you are dead*

In My Angelhood

One autumn evening, I left
school and was
waiting at the bus stop
when the tree opposite sudden -
LIT UP
dancing lights in the branches

- Is no one else seeing this?

- Am I William Blake now?

Silent popping bubble ecstasy

A glimpse into an
unreadable realm

    No, it was not fireworks
    I know what you're think -
    it was not fireworks

40 years later I can still
sense the dizzy
outburst
and every time
I pass by, nod respect-
fully to the
chosen tree

Which was briefly
host to an out-
break of fizzing
angelic glee

Bethlem

A (not) strange and personal goal
has been to run around the grounds
of the (not) mental hospital
- the psychiatric institution -
with its really rather good free museum
near where I grew up
and today in the July rain
I achieved this goal, with new
trail shoes for the grass
propelling me round the course in
a very respectable time
- relatively speaking -
- all things considered -
and I just wanted to share it with
anyone who might be remotely
interested

Pet

head out the window
5am monsoon, you love
to say petrichor

Get up get on the scene give it a rest

I had a definitely not sex tape
it was just a C90 cassette
fucking google it, I can't
do all the work for you

One side was Mazzy Star
the other was the Cowboy Junkies
so carbon date that, in fact
it was 1990

    - Here he goes again
      reminiscing from the rocking chair

Now *sucks a thoughtful tooth*
you youngsters might not preciate
how on the right system
these C90s could auto-reverse
so you didn't have to get up and change
the tape some say cassette
while entertaining
horizontally, or do
I mean vertically, hee hee

    - grandma please make him stop

Not that I'm claiming I was some
sort of 90 minute Casanova slash
Lothario stroke Hoochie Coochie Man
back in the day, oh boy

    - I think it's time for your nap

    - can we unplug him?

The Trawl, 1979

My new thing was
collecting records, or
vinyls as we now have to call them ffs
you people make me sick

There were Record Fairs where
collectors gathered in fusty
church halls
to part with their cash after
flicking through
boxes stuffed with
trash and treasures

At my first one, armed
with all my pocket money
    a teenage fiend
    hungry for relics,
I scored nine well-used items
for an absurd £13 (and my poor
mother provided £3 of that)

        Paranoid

        Aoxomoxoa

        Surrealistic Pillow

        After the Gold Rush

        In Search of Space

        Safe as Milk

        Strange Days

        Hot Rats

        Yes (self-titled)

I was well into being a
suburban hippy for a few months
before many other
phases of the moon
and I stand by every one

Of course now, as an ancient,
olden and also aged man
    my eyes are dim
    my back is bent
    my knees are knacked

I am looking to sell my collection
  clear some space
    maybe
      keep a 100 'vinyls'
        you people make me sick
and these will form part of that 100

In Search of Space
has the original 'gimmix' sleeve and
24pp booklet, so that's not going
anywhere, even if
I have nothing to play it on

All Lit Up, 1990

This may be more than 

a little undignified 

to record but

when I was in you and

everything was on fire

you looked into 

my eyes

delighted

surprised

and said YOURE

SPARKLING

and yes once I was

The Parliament of Caws

KRRRT-chack! (Old One-Eye snaps his beak, wings puffed.)

CHREEE-Kaa! (Young Tailflick lands beside him, tilting her head.)

Old One-Eye: Krrt-chack! Krrt-chack!
A warning: sky-fox (hawk) nearby. Sharp wing. Fast death. Stay low.

Tailflick: CHREE! Chree-ka-ka-ka-KA!
Disbelief. Bravado. She flew near it. Stole a beetle mid-glide. No fear.

Two-Wing-Drum: DRRRRR-kak-kak-kak! (Wings slapping trunk.)
Challenge. Boast. He saw her. Beetle was already dead. Empty glory.

Tailflick: Ka-KA-KA-krrrrrp!
Insult. Two-Wing eats rotten fruit. Mind like snail. Beak like old bark.

Chirpette (a tiny, newly-fledged thing): tzeep-tzeep-tzee?
Confusion. What is “death?” What is “hawk?” Can you eat it?

Old One-Eye: GRAWWWK. (Low, guttural.)
Silence. Night is coming. Time for truth, not noise.

(All birds still. Then, slowly, a rattling murmur builds—)

All Together: chrr-chrr-CHAAA, kr-kr-ka-KAW, chreeeee-CHACK, tzzzzrr!
The Sharing begins. Gossip. Echoes. Stolen things.

Bent-Beak: chack-chack. Chack.
He found shine. Blue-glass-circle. Deep hole near water.

Three-Toe: Krrreeek! KA-ka-ka!
Jealous. He saw it first. Bent-Beak just louder.

Tailflick: cheeeeeeee. (Slow, high pitch.)
Dream. She flew so high her wings turned to cloud. Chased stars. Bit the moon.

Old One-Eye: KRRRRAW-CHAK.
Reminder. Dreamers fly crooked. Sky is not gift. Sky is blade.

(Wind rustles. A squirrel chitters nearby. All heads snap in unison.)

Chirpette: tzee?
Can we eat it?

All Together: KAW-KAW-KAW-KAW! (A terrible cacophony of agreement.)

No one flies. Just noise. Noise is hunt. Noise is dance. Noise is magpie. Twelve dark shapes tuck heads into wings. One eye each on the moon. Still dreaming of shine.

Found note

I don't think we're put on this earth to
live alone

Basically, I think we were put here
to suffer
as much as possible

Pew pew

Speed! Speed!

Crash Crash Clonk

Unidentified laughter
resulting in a torrent of [checks]
4.30a.m. summer bright morning
profanity which I, for once, am
too polite to transcribe and

Some of which I admit emanates
from my semi-slumbering form

Crash Crunch Pop

I ask, mostly to myself, wtf
they are doing down there
and why there

Pad and squint through the curtains
old school twitcher

A brutish fellow and his Speed hound
kicking trash and cursing in an area
he really has no business inhabiting
although I have no legal claim upon it

Would it really be a crime
if I somehow came into possession
of a 3D printed weapon and
peppered perhaps sprayed them
with a volley of fast dissolving ice shards
not bullets
which I have just invented

Yelling at the blameless Speed
and hurling abuse at the red faced cackler
woman on the balcony to the right
hair like Mr Whippy
vaping gleefully

Slamming her window open and shut
in rhythmic provocation
punctuated with some well-honed
sing-song insults

While he's kicking a can along the path
calling her one name over and over his
vocabulary failing him
his energy slowly depleting

One volley for you, one round
for you, spare Speed, and
no one would convict
me, my aim is true

Thank you Richard Coles

Sometimes we need to stumble
across permission
confirmation
for our proclivities, like

When you said you'd just like to
'walk around looking at things'
in your retirement

And there you are seeing
little brown sparrows
in the rippling flat top hedge

Dressed for the rain
walking in the zone

Comparing avenues of tree trunks
to cathedrals

Admiring the prehistoric
Highland fold

Water and tinnitus
the soundtrack to our days

Speaking of
liquid light as
a medium of the holy
and living in a
three-dimensional theology

A blaze of light
floods the valley

Yes, we need
silence and retreat
yes, we need
contemplation

We need to look
a bit more closely
and shut up
a lot more

Thank you James Parker

I will
cultivate the exquisite
portion of my own remarkable
consciousness

I shall
remain untroubled
strew petals and
relish the long,
long solitary days

Decorate my
tortoise with jewels
perhaps

And society, I remain in a
perpetual state of undeclared
war with you
and I owe you nothing

From the ant colony

~~~::•••••==~==•==~==•••••::~~~  

↑↓↑↓><><~*~☼~*~<><><↓↑↓↑  

•••+++⌁⌁⌁...⌁⌁⌁+++•••  

[∆∆∆]—.—.—>[ΩΩΩ]~↯↯↯~<ΩΩΩ]<—<—<  

sksksk...zzzttt...clack.clack.tchk-tchk...  

●╳●╳● ╰⊚⊚⊚╯ ●╳●╳●  

<<<:: »»»»~°~°~°~«««« ::>>>  

|||-|||-|||-∆∆∆-|||-|||-|||  

☽☽☽°°°∿∿∿::::∿∿∿°°°☾☾☾  

ssssk———ssth———shht———ttrrr  

...~:…◊◊◊↺↺↺...~:...  

+++𝕣𝕒𝕤𝕡++𝕥𝕒𝕡++𝕓𝕦𝕫𝕫+++  

( ) ( ) ( ) ∴∴∴ ⌁⌁⌁ [ ] [ ] [ ]  

↗↘↗↘↗↘~♥~↙↖↙↖↙↖  

°°°###↻↻↻###°°°  

→→→→zzchzzz←←←←  

…sniff.sniff.flick.flick.tap.tap…

→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→  

↪↪↪↪↪↪↪↪↪↪↪↪↪↪↪↪↪↪↪↪  

:::pherocurrent complete:::

Sunbeam Diplomacy

Mino: brrrrrp-chirp-click (a soft throat trill, inquisitive)
(Roughly translates to: “This sunbeam. You found it first?”)

Tatch: mrrrrRRrrrrr-hnnnkkk-mrr! (a rising purr with a nasal grunt)
(Loosely: “I made it mine. I circled three times. Standard claim.”)

Mino: mrrow-pffft-click-click (a chattering protest, tail flicks once)
(Meaning: “You always claim before assessing optimal warmth ratio. Typical.”)

Tatch: (pauses mid-lick, one eye squinting) hnnn-mmmMRRRgh!
(“Your tail was in my face. That invalidates your scientific opinion.”)

Mino: (low tail thump) mrrrrrrrp-chk!
(“Incorrect. My tail is a sensor. I was testing wind currents.”)

Tatch: (snorts, rolls to his back dramatically) huff-snerk-yowww!
(“Your sensor smells like kibble dust and betrayal.”)

(A moment of contemplative silence. Both cats blink slowly at each other — the sacred feline equivalent of a truce offering.)

Mino: mmm-prrp?
(“...Share the beam?”)

Tatch: (tail twitch, a thoughtful knead on the rug) mrr-ack-mrr.
(“Fine. But only if I get the pillow corner.”)

Mino: chirrup-purrrr
(“Accepted. I claim the ripple of heat near the floor vent.”)

(They shuffle around each other in lazy spirals, eventually settling — a soft tangle of black and orange. Their purring merges into a syncopated harmony.)

Tatch: (barely audible, half-asleep) snrk-puh...mrrr.
(“If the red dot comes, you chase first. I pulled a claw yesterday.”)

Mino: (eyes closed, a soft ear twitch) mm-hmm-mrrrgh.
(“Understood. We shall strike as one. United.”)

(Outside, a bird chirps. Neither cat moves.)

Tatch: ...tsk.
(“Tomorrow.”)

Mino: ...purrr.
(“Tomorrow.”)

Whole Network Pulse

:ƒΔ₁: (a young tendril exploring moist soil)
~..:~:shimmer:~:..~
↝↯↝(signal of water nearby, curious probing)
⇶⇶⇶⇶✧✧✧ (expansion initiated)

:φΩ₄₇: (an ancient rootlike strand, embedded deep beneath oak roots)
∞°°°μμμ••
♲⇡⇡⇡⇡⌘⌘⌘ (acknowledgment, warning: acid trace in clay layer above)
—ººº— (emits a bitter-spore memory echo)
⇊⇊⇊✧ (subtle nudge to veer leftward)

:ƒΔ₁:
☍☍☍ (gratitude spike)
⇄⇄⇄::∴ (rerouting mycelial path)
↯↯°º°↯↯ (playful zap of spore glee)

:φΩ₄₇:
…¤¤¤¤¤… (release of slow ancestral warmth)
⇉⇉⇉† (invitation to a decaying cedar log two meters east)
↻↻↻≜ (knowledge share: recent beetle activity, nutrient-rich zone)

:ƒΔ₁:
☉☉☉ (pulsing agreement)
⇶⇶✴⇶ (network joining sequence)
[:::] (echo merged into collective memory)

🌌➿🌌➿🌌 (seasonal fruiting preparation initiated)
☈☈☈ (thunder detected above: rain imminent)
⇄⇄⇄⇄⇄⇄⇄ (massive mycelial stir—communion spreads)

Unexpected, and Unasked for, Minor Erotica 2

There was a theatrical interpretation of
House of Leaves staged in London's Covent Garden
which for some reason I thought might make
an interesting date option
kill me now, sorry for trying

So we entered a dusty warehouse for
this interactive event, like I always say
we should embrace new experiences

There was a chapter in this no-budget incoherent
student display where me and my date
divided into separate areas and I had to yell
out an upsetting childhood memory
(don't ask why just go along with it)
which was a little distressing
but then the 'actress'

Held me tight and
licked my face all over
was that in the book, I forget
up and down and all around
an unusual move to be sure
I was paralysed I went cross-eyed and
barely ever recovered, she
really lost herself in the role

Unexpected, and Unasked for, Minor Erotica 1

One time I was on London's
busy Oxford Street
crossing the road
when I ended up doing the
awkward dancing encounter
the side to side shuffle
you know what I'm talking about
if you don't then go away now
with a camel coat wearing
executive type lady and yes heels yes

I went left, she went left
from my pov (which stands for point of view)
I went right, she went right, see above
I wasn't trying to be a nuisance
but it was quite confusing
then I went left, she went left
I went right, she went right
you get the picture, yes we see

This went on for one verse too long
(from her pov) then
she let out an exasperated HAH!
shoved me hard in the chest
shocked >I buckled< OOOF!

I have to say she had every right
and it takes an alpha-beta male
to admit this, thank you
for your attention to this matter

The greatest American band of all time # scientific # objectivity (by a 'Brit')

Let us establish some ground rules

We're talking bands here
solo artists with renowned backing groups
e.g. Crazy Horse / the E Street Band are clearly not bands
thus disqualified from this discussion good day

Any audience member who nominates
or leads the cheers for 70s/80s
rock stroke glam stroke hair rock bands such as
Kiss Aerosmith Van Halen Bon Jovi, Guns n Roses
- I could go on please don't- shall be found in
contempt of court and their protes-
ations shall not be admitted good day

Niche will not cut it however
sympathetic the judge may be
so sorry Pavement Pixies Fugazi et cet
we're looking for mainstream success + cultural import
the combo of 'cutting through'

So let us acknowledge
that Talking Heads and Blondie
are good calls ~and move on~

And what about the Dead
what to do with the Dead *sighs*
the court sympathizes, but
please respect the science, viz.

We need a catalogue
of well known tunes some say hits, popular
and legacy but crucially non-divisive
which sees off contenders such as
the Doors (loved by many, yet hated by many),
Steely Dan (see previous), Eagles (you get the picture)
murder your darlings //
personal favourites are irrelevant
we must respect the scientific method

Quick reminder: the Bee Gees are not American
and any votes for them will be vigorously prosecuted
see also the Fleetwood Mac clause
& excuse me, Rush are Canadian
take that man away!

Please be aware
I have another list here of more than
100 bands mere mention of whose names
could result in instant prison time

Which also +++ pauses for lunch +++
discounts the Beach Boys, face it very
inconsistent, excuse me, did I hear someone say
what about the Monkees!

*Bangs gavel*

*Clears throat*

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury there
  remain two credible candidates
     whose brief but impactful careers
      appealed to different generations
        broke across political divides and

[[[transcript ends here]]]