Through art they are born

Want to join a(n) humunculus club
find a group who will embrace me
maybe try out paracelsus.net
maybe learn to spell homunculus
correctly for a start, okay

Look all I want
all I've ever wanted is
to find my people, my little prophets

Miniature constructs
with the ability to foresee the future
carry out some light admin
and spying missions
cast a harmless spell or two

Not trying to enslave the world
just find some fellow
neuroanatomical enthusiasts
no bunny pervs, no string-
dancing Geppetto creeps

Keep it pure, back to the old ways
putrefaction in a horse's womb
the dedicated harvesting of sperm cells

Classic alchemy before the
TikTok generation ruined it

I'll find me some devoted
collaborators, soon they'll be my friends
show up ready with the glass jar
and some intimacy biscuits

I think I bust a button on my trousers, I hope they don't fall down

Sure I put my trousers on
yes I think I put my pants on too

Certainly can't complain, even if I am (don't say it)
guilty of all related charges, and so what

For a 50 years now I've
put and pulled my trousers on, and
offtimes with a belt
steady on, sounds a bit raunchy now

Sir do you know I have
unashamedly Put My Trousers On
in Crystal Palace, Highbury & Islington
Euston, Kilburn and Paris

You step in you step out
You step in you step out
You step in you step out
You step in you step out

I have yanked them on
and ripped them right off again
I'm talking about my famous trousers
mis pantalones legendarios

I've done it in Nottingham, done it in Norwich
really no need to go through this twice
I've done it in Manchester, see also Mansfield
don't say nothing that's my advice

Sir, I have to ask
- have you been drinking?
- and where exactly are 
  these famous trousers?

Trigger Down

It was a sore affair
you killed our horse & called
it collateral damage

But you freed us hostages
unfairly known as
the Cigarette Gang
in the smokescreen chaos

Now I'm at this here party
with these fancy boys, silk sleeves
and rowing club haught

Trying to blend, trying
to forget about the farm

Spelling Bee

With its seven letters always poses
more of a challenge than Connections
or Wordle; and Sudoku as we have established
can politely do one

Anyway, mother advised  me that today's
pangram word was OUTHOUSED

Wrong letters, and it's
not a real word I countered, 'just
fucking play it son', she squawked

In an uncharacteristic outburst
'you know words arenyt the same hier
bustin my noggin trying to talk sense to ya'

- excuse me

'In this realm, I've tellt before
but ye never listen know, just
liek you never did befour'

- I haven't

'Also its tomorrows answer thass
why don' fit, told ya time
don' work the same hier too'

Jigidi Jogon

On my run glanced down
on my run
I go running now
75 if I'm a day
saw a lone jigsaw piece
on the path, a
piece of the pie,
on the path

Maybe next time around I'll pick up
that piece of the pie, on
the path, maybe it's the missing
piece of the
puzzle; the under- or over-
oxygenated brain, which

Always comes up with
the best
solutions

Slow Sunday

Trying not to talk too fast

Suggestion of slowness or
concerning tortoises

Encouraged to think of escapism
and the spaces you go to relax,
to unwind

In my room, which is also
a good place to hide
and pretend to be working

I am planning trips
to the beach
to the heath

And it's a perfect opportunity
to play this...

Always bring a gun

Look at me and my choppers
look at me and my knives
I'm a chef baby that's my excuse

Gonna chop you up man
gonna slice you up sucker
there ain't nothing you can